Loserberry
by PurpleBacon
Summary: "Everyone tells me that I'm a loser, and I would have to build my walls thicker every time. For once, I want someone to tell me that I'm not a loser, that I'm just as good as everyone else is." Stevie's POV.
1. Chapter 1

Hi guys! I'm baack for the Christmas break! I'm gonna have a lot of fics coming soon! This one's part of contribution for Zevie month! Hope you like it! Read on wooooppppp

Disclaimer (for whole fic): I DO NOT OWN HOW TO ROCK AT ALL. If I did, it wouldn't have ended.

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"Loserberry."

Again and again, I stand up to their words of discouragement. I force myself to not care, because they're all just a bunch of stuck-up girls stuck in their world of "Me." I tell myself that they don't matter and I should just brush every word they spit at me over my shoulder and throw it back at them.

But, I couldn't escape the wondering thoughts in my mind. Was I really a loser?

For years and years, I've been the girl in the background who never spoke up. I've been the girl never picked for a best friend. I've been the girl standing there while the two girls beside me get asked out to a date. I've been the girl who got overlooked when I was right in front of them. I've been the girl that has never been called pretty by anyone. I've been the girl that never had to choose which guy to pick for a dance because the only ones who would ever say yes are the desperate ones. I've been the girl stuck in another person's shadow, always second best- second best at writing or singing or playing this instrument, but never the best.

Maybe that's why these walls started forming.

"Stevie!" I hear Zander call my name. "Tell me you've said yes to being our lead singer."

I roll my eyes. It's been a month since Zander Robbins has become a student in Brewster, but he's already convinced two other guys to make a band with him. This boy was serious about his music. "Zander, I can't sing."

Zander and I have been best friends since we were seven, but he moved away and only came back during summer. Even so, we kept in touch every week during schooldays. And finally, his dad got a job here and now he's finally a schoolmate.

"Yes, you can!" He retorts, pouting a little bit. "I've heard you!"

"Zander, why can't you just be the lead singer?"

"Because I'll be playing the string instruments and we need a girl!" He deadpans, saying it as if it's the most obvious thing in the world. "I feel like the band would be lacking without someone else."

I bite my lip. He looks at me with those silly puppy-dog eyes. I giggle. He looked stupid. "Zander, I'm just gonna tell you to stop that right now and never do it again because you look silly."

He stares at me as if I just offended his family. "I always thought that looked cute. It always worked at my old school."

"Well, maybe that's because people took pity on you for looking like an idiot in a public place." I say, laughing at his expression. "But tell you what."

"What?" He asks, his eyes growing big.

"I'll be part of your band." I start. He jumps and cheers in joy, but I get hold of his shoulder. "Hold your horses, Robbins. I never said I'll be the lead singer."

"What?" He asks, confused. "That doesn't solve the problem at all!"

"Yes, it does. You said you needed a girl in your band, so I'll join, only I'll be playing the bass." I tell him, smirking at his defeat.

He sighs and tries to smile. "Good enough." He stretches his hand out and I take it. "Stevie Baskara, you are officially our base player."

I nod my head in agreement. "Now, all you have to do is continue looking for a lead singer."

He gives a tiny smile. "She'll come."

"Sure." I say and turn to leave.

"Hey, Stevie." He calls. I turn back and see him smiling widely. "You would have made a really pretty lead singer."

Zander Robbins, only guy that sees the special in me.

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yup wasn't my best but whatever i tried! Leave a review and you get some Christmas cookies and milk, just like Santa! ={)~ Hope you like the next chapter =) Stay Classy!


	2. Chapter 2

Hope you like the story so far! Sorry it's kind of OOC and different, but I tried :) Here's the next chapter! Hope you like it! =)

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_Stevie, finally got the band a lead singer. We're at the hangout._

I enter the room, holding my bass by its neck. "Hey, guys." I greet, closing the door behind me.

The smile on my face instantly leaves once I see Kacey Simon at the center of the room. Even with braces and glasses and her reputation falling to bits, I'll never forget what she did to my life.

"Loserberry?"

This girl, who has ruined my life and made me believe that I was really a nothing, is standing in our hangout with my best friends. She's already taken everything from me. She's gotten out on dates with my crushes, she's stolen the spotlight when I had the chance of being in it, she's stomped on what was left on my self-confidence. And now, she's stealing my friends.

A bitter taste comes to my mouth as I realize what she's doing here. I take a deep breath. Keep those walls steady, Stevie.

"Excuse me." I start, glaring at her. "You call me that name in front of my friends, and I'll introduce my bass to your face." I raise the instrument for emphasis, blaring a mocking smile.

I turn to the boys, watching in fright. "What's she doing here?" I ask, secretly hoping my speculations are wrong.

Zander gives an uncertain smile and looks from me to her. "She's our new singer." All of them crowd together to protect themselves from my expecting punch. I figure I have to deal with them later.

I stare daggers at Kacey Simon. I knew for sure that this girl could not sing. All she ever did was lipsync, and stupidly enough, everyone fell for it just because she was pretty. "So, you want to be in Gravity 4?"

"Not really." She answers. Of course, she doesn't. "But if I did, I would make you a much better band."

This was coming from the girl who posed every 5 seconds, who sang with a recorded song, who probably can't even hold an instrument. But, I've never heard her sing without a CD player before.

I shrug. "All right, then let's hear you sing." I step beside the guys. "Show us all the you _can hold it down_."

"Why do you all keep doing that?" She asks after we do our signature hand movement.

I fake a smile. "I'm hearing a lot of talking. I'm not hearing any singing."

"Okay. Fine."

She clears her throat, and all of the sudden I get this uneasy feeling. What if she's actually a really good singer? What if she would actually get to be our lead and steal not only my friends, but also this whole band? I brush the thought away. Of course, a girl that needs a recorded track to sing for her would have a bad voice.

She starts singing "I'll Be There", and I find myself letting go of a breath. With just the first word, she start doing all these crazy hand gestures and her voice sounds all nasally.

But somewhere, beyond all those extracurricular, I was almost certain there was a really good voice.

She continues singing and I'm becoming more and more sure by the second that she would not suck if she actually put something real in it. I hope the rest don't notice it, but I know Zander's a bigger music freak than I am. I'm pretty sure he'll see through all those movements and tell her to stop it. And plus, he practically desperate.

She finally finishes the song with some pose. "That was awful." I tell her.

"I'm outta here." She says, then grabs her bag.

"Give her another chance, please." Zander whispers in my ear. I knew it.

"No." I say. She passes by me and I wave a taunting goodbye at her.

"Stevie." He scolds me.

"Zander, she's just gonna te—" I don't even get to finish my sentence when he's already catching up with her.

"Kacey, Kacey, Kacey, Kacey." He calls, stopping her from leaving. "Look, I know you just got dumped by your friends and you're feeling kinda low."

"So what?" She says. I roll my eyes. How thick can this girl get?

And why does Zander have to be so motivational?

"Sing that." He cheers, with that goofy smile I've always found cute. "No, really. Take that feeling and sing it."

He looks over at us with a tiny smile. I try my best to look happy. But I know that she's already gonna have the spot for lead singer and again I'll be the shadow.

She starts singing normally now.

And she sounds great.

I never get what I want.

"_Hey, you what's the matter. Lately you've been looking down."_ She sings with ease as if she's been born for the spotlight. While I'm here putting up with everything because the farthest I'll ever be to the spotlight is second voice.

_Is that someone in the mirror  
The reason you don't come around?_

_That's crazy_

I sing those two words, staring at her with jealousy.

Kacey Simon has always been the start of everything and she would always put me down. And now that I've gotten the chance to prove myself better than her, now that she's lost her reputation, I'm still the one lurking in the shadows. Nothing's ever changed and I don't think it will ever be. I'll never be one of them, I'll always be just Loserberry.

_This isn't the you I know_

Nobody even knows me well enough to see the insecurity that has left me scarred. Some part of me has always been telling me "You're great, Stevie. Don't let them get you down." Will it always be like that? Me against the world? Everyone tells me that I'm a loser, and I would have to build my walls thicker every time. For once, I want someone to tell me that I'm not a loser, that I'm just as good as everyone else is.

_Feeling un-pretty._

That's all I'll ever be.

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Awww, poor Stevie =( Tell me what you think! Virtual cookie for everyone and since, it's Christmas, throw a brownie in your imagination too! Just imaging the perfect chocolatey goodness you're gonna bite into once you leave a review! :) Next chapter will be the last :) Love you, guys! Keep on keeping on! Stay classy =)


	3. Chapter 3

Here's the final chapter! Really hope that you liked it. Sorry if this one comes a little wrong with all the advice and feelings and stuff. I'm a little too in the Christmas Spirit to think of sad things =) Hope you are too! Enjoy!

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"That was great!" Nelson exclaims. Everyone nods and high-fives in agreement. I do my best to smile and be happy for the band.

I have to face it. Kacey Simons wins again.

"Molly will so be crushed!" Kacey says, smirking at her victory.

I roll my eyes. I can't believe the guys just fell for her voice, totally blinded by her personality. She'll never actually care for the band. She'll never be our friend. She'll just use us to get back at the people who pushed her down, and when it comes down to it, she'll choose her former friends over us in a heartbeat.

"Well, I have to go now." Kacey says, making her way to the door. "See you guys soon."

"We're going to the mall." Kevin tells us. "Wanna come with?"

"I have to help my brothers with their assignments." I lie. I just want some time alone, really.

"Zander?" Nelson asks, already on their way to the door.

He looks at me cautiously. "Um. I'll catch up. You guys go ahead."

"Suit yourself." Kevin shrugs and exits the room with Nelson on his heels.

"And then there were two." Zander says, chuckling.

"Why didn't you go with them?" I ask.

"Because you have a problem." He answers, smiling knowingly.

I raise my eyebrows, surprised at how easily he could read me. "No, I don't."

"Stevie, I've known you for like 10 years and never have I heard you say you'd help your brothers with anything at all."

I bite my lip. Darn it. "Just because I lied, doesn't mean I have a problem." I mutter.

He scoffs. "You've been staring off space, faking smiles, and don't think I didn't notice those messed up chords." He sits down on the couch and pats on the seat beside him, gesturing for me to sit.

I sit down beside him and cross my arms. "Okay, first, you are such a stalker. Second, how do you know those smiles were fake? And third, they were not that messed up! I just got like 2…12 chords wrong. So what?"

"One, no guy can simply just not stalk you." He starts. I blush at the comment.

"Sap." I mumble.

He laughs. "Second, whenever you fake a smile, you bite your lip a little. Third, you usually play perfectly and without flaw. Conclusion, what's wrong?"

"Nothing's wrong, Zander!" I find myself screaming, getting frustrated at how much he knew me.

"And there you have it!" He exclaims. "The fast and furious."

"What?" I say and sink into the couch. I groan and close my eyes. "Z, why do you have to know me so well?"

"It's a gift." He answers. "Now, what's wrong?"

"You'll just laugh at me." I say. "It's stupid."

"The only thing I consider stupid are people who don't eat the first slice of bread. The breadists." He says, glaring into space. I can't help but laugh. "Now, shoot."

I sigh and sit straight. I bite my lip and look at him. He's waiting in apprehension, ready to help me no matter what. I smile timidly.

"Remember that time when we were 10 and you told me I was the prettiest girl in the whole world?" I start, smiling at the memory.

He laughs. "Yup. We were playing in the rain and you were half covered with mud."

"Exactly, and you still found me pretty."

"You were. The mud made your eyes pop."

I laugh. "Really? You never said that before."

"It was what I was thinking."

"Wow, then maybe I should cover my clothes in mud more often." I joke, trying to lighten the situation.

"Shut up. You look pretty no matter what." He answers, taking me off guard.

"There it is." I say.

"What?" He asks, innocently. "Oh my gosh, is this my fault? I'm so sorry, Stevie. Please forgive me. Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry."

"Zander, calm down." I chuckle. "It's not you. It's me."

He looks at me, confused. "Zander, until now you're the only person who has ever called me pretty or ever given me a sincere compliment."

He raises his eyebrow. "I think that's impossible."

I shake my head. "Z, you don't get it. You might have thought I was one of the cool kids back then, but I never was. I was always the last one picked or forgotten or second best. There's just one out of 90 people who would remember me as the instrument player. And once I was chosen, it's because they were desperate. But never was I chosen as best singer or top in the class or prettiest in the club." I could feel the tears seeping to my eyes, but I continue, feeling the weight slowly lift from my shoulders.

"The only thing I've been called was weirdo, or geek, or freak. Loser, most of the time. It was never as bad as now. I used to just be a wallflower, but when Kacey took the throne, I was officially labeled Loserberry. And since, everyone loved The Perfs, everyone in the school called me that too."

Zander puts his arm around my shoulder and pushes me closer to him. My head rests on his shoulder as the tears start falling. "I told myself I don't care anymore at some point. I built walls, unconsciously and pushed away anyone who tried to talk to me. I spoke back and caged the shy person inside of me. Sure, it may have made some people scared of me and they stopped calling me names, but somehow the label stuck. And even though, some people weren't saying it out loud anymore, I knew they still thought it. I told myself I should just close my ears to them and it worked for some time, but now I'm starting to believe them."

"I'm a loser, Zander." I finish, and sob into his shoulder.

"Stevie," He rubs my shoulder. "Stevie, look at me."

He holds my shoulders and makes me look at him. "Zander, I'm a mess."

He holds my face in his hands and wipes my tears with his thumbs. "You're beautiful."

He says it with so much sincerity and love, I feel my heart swell. I close my eyes and try to hold on to those words, recording it in my mind and savoring the voice.

"I have never seen such a beautiful mess." He continues. "Stevie, you're perfect. It's just wrong to be insecure when you're the Stevie Baskara, the most beautiful, talented, smartest girl in the world. I meant every compliment I ever said to you with my whole heart. And you know what, you don't need Kacey Simons to tell you who you are, because my bet is that all along she was intimidated by you. She was jealous of your talent and personality and prettiness. I know for sure you could have easily overtook The Perfs just by smiling."

"Zander." I try to say something, some kind of thanks, but nothing comes out. I'm too surprised with his words.

He smiles. "You're the most special girl in the world." He kisses my forehead, sending a heart-warming shock in me. "And if anyone tells you otherwise, they'll have to go through me….and you." He whispers into my ear.

I laugh and wipe my tears. "Thank you, Zander." I say, putting all the sincerity I could muster in those words.

He smiles, gratefully. "You know you should just continue covering your ears to what they say, because those people don't matter at all. You're better than them. And if you just believe that you're better than them, then you are. Those people are invisible to you from now on, okay?"

I nod my head. He stands up and stretches his hand out. "So, now that you're done helping your brothers with their homework." He kids, making me laugh. "Will you accompany me to the mall, m'lady?"

I take his hand, and he loops our arms together. "Thank you, Z." I repeat, not knowing what else to say.

He laughs. "Save your speechless for later when we go shopping." He looks at me. "I'll always be here for you."

I smile, gratefully. "Same here."

"Now, as we walk to the mall," He says, as we walk outside. "I will continue saying things that will flatter you."

"What?" I ask, surprised. "Zander, you don—"

"I think that you are the bestest at playing the bass." He starts.

I laugh, rolling my eyes. "Bestest? Really?"

"Shut up. I'm complimenting you." He says, trying to appear serious. "You are a very good singer. Yes, that time you sand You and I with me. Wow, that was an angel of a voice right there."

"Z, I think this is a little overboard."

"You have really pretty eyes, too. Like the richest of chocolates."

"You're not gonna stop until we reach the mall, are you?" I ask.

"Nope." He chuckles. "Now, you better keep quiet or else no ice cream for you, young lady."

And as Zander continues throwing compliments about me, I realize that the doubts and insecurities will come back, but at least now I know I have Zander by my side, the only guy who ever makes me special. And maybe he's the only person I need.

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PS if you haven't listened to the Holiday Medley by Max and Victoria yet, please do. It's perfection dshjgbsdjgnjsad oh and listen to Max's Jingle Bells :) Anyways, that's it for this fic! I really hope you like it! I'm going to start my 100 word challenge for Seddie and Zevie now :) Reviews for the whole fic and you get a whole sack of delicious goodies! Stay classy! =) See you soon and Merry Christmas!


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